Getting Stronger

Addy is practicing a lot and has gotten much better at holding her head up the past couple weeks. I was able to snap some pictures today while she was putting her strength to the test. She melts my heart! I can't get enough of her pretty little face.

I am super excited, because this weekend I am going to the baby expo at West World. It's probably the last thing I should be doing, since I am going to want to buy one of everything! But I saw it on TV and I just had to buy tickets! Besides.. those were cheap.. AND it's right down the street! How convenient! It doesn't take much to excite me these days anyway. Any little adventure outside the home is enough to thrill me!

Smile!

Addy's first BIG smile caught on camera. I love this picture. She is so sweet. She is starting to smile more and more, although it is still very random. I can't tell if she is smiling on purpose or not.

Addy and I are participating in Southern Arizona's 10th Annual Race for the Cure, in Tucson on April 6th. Of course Addy will most likely sleep in her stroller the entire time, letting me do all the work! Either way, I'll enjoy her company. I am currently trying to raise some money for the cause. Anyone interested in donating (even just a small amount, like $10) can do so here.

July 1st of this year will be 4 years since my grandmother passed away. Breast cancer (& the negligence of doctors) took her life. She is not the only person in my family who has suffered from breast cancer, but she is the first that didn't survive. I miss her every day and I wish she was here to meet her great-granddaughter. She would love her. It hurts to know that Addison will never have known my grandmother. She was such a wonderful and extremely caring person. I will always remember her..

Two other members of my family have suffered and survived breast cancer. It's such a serious reality in my family. This is much of the reason I try to support the cause as much as possible. Please help if you can! Any little bit helps.

One Month!

Addy is now one month old! I can't believe how fast the month went by. She is currently around 8 lbs, probably a little more. She is already starting to surprise us with new discoveries. She is half way to holding her head up on her own. She lifts it up to look at us when we hold her to our chest and she can hold it for about 30 seconds before she gets wobbly and lays it down. She is gaining much more control of her arms and her hands. She grabs onto my hand during feedings and she takes a hold of my shirt when I hold her to my chest. She has an occasional attitude problem already. When she is hungry and we dare try to hold her over with a pacifier, she will fling it out of her mouth with vengeance and scream. She is also requiring a lot more "attention" lately. She has developed a liking to be held - A LOT! Lucky for her I like to cuddle with her. I just don't want her getting TOO spoiled with it, but who can resist the little bundle of love?

Here are some of Addy's first portraits ..

Sleeping Addy

I recorded a little video of Addy sleeping in her swing. She makes funny noises when she sleeps sometimes. It sounds like some sort of bird mating call to me, just thought it was funny enough to share!

Baby's First Portraits

Yesterday I took Addy to get her very first portraits. They came out great. I have to wait almost two weeks to get them which is driving me nuts! I will surely post them when I have them though. She did really well. I was so worried that she would cry the whole time or sleep through them, but she was awake and happy and even looked at the camera! It was a success, I am so excited to get them!

The trip to JC Penney for portraits was also our very first "solo" outing together. Just Addy and I. It was nice.

That's all the big news I have for now. We are mostly staying home and doing a lot of nothing! It's amazing how much time flies just sitting around the house now. It seems like she feeds non-stop all day. As if she wants to start eating as soon as she finishes eating. Sometimes it's actually the case. This girl is eating a TON! She seems to be gaining weight just as she is suppose to though, so I guess she's just a growing baby with an appetite.

Nights are hit and miss. Most nights she will sleep 3-4 hours at a time, waking only 2-3 times to eat. Although she may turn into the she-devil at any which one of those awakenings. Sometimes at the beginning of the night, either before we have actually gone to sleep or right after we have fallen asleep, she will wake up and decide now it is time to play and if we don't want to, well too bad cause we sure as hell aren't going to get any sleep. Or sometimes (seems quite often lately..) it will be around 5:30am. This seems to be her favorite time to wake up and stay up. She also expects live entertainment. She needs to learn that mommy is not a morning person and it's in her best interest to sleep until 7 or so.. I will continue cutting her some slack for the time being, but this will definitely be addressed in the near future!

I've never been a believer of the "colic". At least - I believe if a baby is crying (non-stop, or not) it is for some reason. I have never believed that a baby will cry for NO reason. Addison is trying to make a believer out of me. She thinks it sounds like a fun venture. "The night of terror" was the only time Addy actually cried for 4 hours STRAIGHT with no "reason". At least not one I could figure out. I like to believe it was gas..But ever since that night she's been overall more fussy! When she is awake it seems that there is little time that she is content. This was why I was so concerned about pictures, but she seemed to enjoy it. Maybe it was the new environment. It has made things much more stressful for me though. Not only is it just flat out annoying that she insists on crying after she has been fed, changed, cuddled with, etc.. but it's also almost insulting to me. I feel like I am doing something wrong. I hate that I cannot make her happy. I have been 100% devoted to her and her every need since 5:07pm on Feb 2! The moment she popped out my priorities became - Addison! And still, no matter how much I do, sometimes she just isn't satisfied. So.. now I am on a NO dairy and NO chocolate diet, in order to determine if the cows milk in my diet, through my breast milk, is effecting her. We think (due to some research) that she may just be gassy and/or in pain a lot due to something in my diet that she is unable to digest properly. I never knew how much breastfeeding could rule my life!

Anyway, we hope to curb this problem soon so we can all be much happier around here. It was difficult when our happy two week old baby woke up one morning and decided she would no longer be happy! This is what frustrates me.

Night of Terror

Since Addison has come home, the nights have been pretty tolerable - even good! There have been a few nights that were difficult, but more that were pretty easy. She generally wakes about three times a night, every three hours or so. She eats and will usually go back to sleep.

Last night was different. I didn't know if we would make it out alive! Our little princess turned into some ferocious she-devil! She woke up at midnight and SCREAMED until 4am! We tried everything! Of course we fed her, changed her, and cuddled her - but it just wouldn't stop. She has not been a big screamer in her entire 16 day life, but last night she broke those lungs in good!

Before last night, Addison had never even been awake for a 4 hour stretch and somehow she managed to not only stay awake, but scream at the top of her tiny little lungs for four long hours. It was horrible. The worst part is not being able to fix her. It makes me feel like I'm not doing something right. I felt horrible. I kept trying to sooth her, hold her, rub her back. Anything and everything I could think of - and nothing worked. I was worried that something was really wrong, but her temperature was normal.

Poor daddy.. Yesterday was his first day back to work and she decides it's NOW time to keep mommy and daddy up ALL night. I would have taken her out of the room to allow him to sleep, but it was him or his parents who were going to lose sleep - I chose him!

She seems to be in a better mood today, although she is a little worn out. She has spent all day thus far sleeping. Every time she wakes up, I feed her and change her and she falls back to sleep. I hope to keep her up when she wakes from this nap for as long as possible in hopes to get some sleep tonight and keep the beast at bay!

Who knew such a cute little 7 pounder could cause so much grief? It's a good thing she's such a cutie. I still love her! I just hate to see her so unhappy!

Here are some pictures of my little valentine on valentines day..

Welcome Addison

Addison Rylee was born on February 2, 2008 at 5:07pm. She was 6 lbs. 15 oz. and 21.5 in. long.



Motherhood is an amazing thing. It's still almost unreal. I can't believe this beautiful little girl is mine! I can't believe we made her! She is such an amazing little person. I am so honored to be her mother.

Labor was not as bad as I expected. In fact, it wasn't bad at all - thanks to the epidural of course. Everything went very smooth. It was incredible to see her face after 9 months of anticipation. She is perfect. I couldn't imagine anything more precious!

So far things have been pretty good. I am recovering well and Addison is letting us get some sleep...most nights.

Here's some pictures of our little princess: